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OMGPD: Bikini Man, Biological Weapon

Take a look at some of the more compelling police reported from around the state. An arrest does not indicate a conviction.

Bikini-Clad Man Arrested in NK

It’s a story every guy can relate to: your favorite bikini is dirty and you have nothing to wear except a girls size 10 bikini that you just happen to have in your possession. Ok, maybe not every guy, but at least one man from North Kingstown had this problem last week.

The 54-year-old man was arrested after reportedly yelling, cursing and flipping off neighbors. One neighbor caught the act on tape as the man allegedly trespassed on his property. The neighbor told the man he was calling police, prompting the suspect to say his cat knew more than local law enforcement. After police took the man into custody, the man took his shirt off … then removed a bikini top from his pants and tied it around the cell bars. After taking off his pants and socks, officers learned that the man was wearing a girls size 10 fluorescent bikini bottom as well. He reportedly told officers that his favorite bikini ensemble was soiled so he had to make do with this one.

Police once again left him in the cellblock, but returned after they reportedy heard him laughing to himself, growling at the cell bars, calling the light a liar and banging his head against the wall. He was brought to the hospital for treatment and a mental evaluation.

Not a Fan of Pedestrians

One Woonsocket man seemed to have an issue grasping the concept of “right of way” and “pedestrians in crosswalks” prior to his arrest last week. The 20-year-old man allegedly let out some road rage after the driver in front of him let two women across the crosswalk and began honking his horn at the man. When several youths entered the crosswalk and the other driver allowed them to cross, too, the man allegedly began honking, flipping off the other driver and swearing. The two men got out of their cars, at which point the road raging driver whipped a pipe out of his car and allegedly hit the man on the head. He was charged with felony assault.

One Man, One DUI Charges and an Unknown Amount of Tacos.

Never get in the way of a drunk person’s quest for fast food. Middletown police had a difficult time trying to arrest a 22-year-old man on charges of drunken driving. Police followed the man down West Main Road as he swerved, then abruptly turned into Taco Bell and allegedly began urinating in the parking lot. Police were ready to make an arrest, but then the man pulled up to the drive-thru to order some chow. When an officer told him to pull forward, the man allegedly refused and continued ordering his late-night noms. Eventually, the man pulled forward and was arrested after failing his field sobriety test. It is unknown at this time whether or not he ever got his tacos.

Respect for the Deceased

Johnston Police charged a 51-year-old man with disorderly conduct and simple assault for allegedly throwing an urn containing a deceased relatives ashes during an argument with his girlfriend on Friday. He was arraigned before a bail commissioner and released on personal recognizance. A no-contact order was issued. He is due to reappear in court on May 1.

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